Part III of “It’s a Yes”
If you’ve been following the past two post and answering the questions, I hope you’ve been pro-active and exploring how saying YES is impacting your life. Were there any surprises or did it confirm what you’ve known all along? We need to become more aware of how our YES is impacting our day to day lives.
One of the big aha moments for me in this YES discovery journey was this – my yes to others had a higher rate of completion, than my yes to myself. A pattern I’m actively implementing change to better my life. Let me share a few examples.
Working for another person – I’m asked to handle a project outside of my assigned duties, and I say Yes. My action is to get it done within the deadline. Despite whatever else is going on I get it done.
Working for myself – I set a goal and deadline for a project and say yes. Life interruptions happen, I don’t compete the project within the deadline.
Personal life – I’ve found writing out a “to do” list works well for me. So, on Thursday nights I prepare my weekend list. Yes, to read, workout, meditate, write, cook, clean, time with spouse, running errands, walking dog, meeting friends, etc.
When I neglect areas of self-care like working out, meditating, resting etc. and everything else gets attention, by Sunday night I’m pleased with the getting “things” done part, but unhappy because I neglected me from the list.
I know you can relate. We don’t set out to intentionally deny and say no to our personal development and what matters, but sometimes it happens. So how can you reach another healthy level of yes in your life that will help you flourish and not fade?
Flourish to “grow or develop in a healthy or vigorous way, especially as the result of a particularly favorable environment”
- Decide right now – what will it take for you to flourish? What is one benefit you can begin to gain from developing a particular area of your life? (Don’t rush this question, write down your answer. It will help you create a plan to achieve the result/s you desire)
Fade to “lose strength or freshness, to become weaker, to disappear gradually, to become less bright, to lose color”
- Decide right now – what benefit are you deriving from being in the place where you’re losing strength, freshness, and brightness?
- Is what and whom you’re saying yes to causing you to flourish or fade?
- Are you happy?
Let’s be clear, we’re not going to get it right 100% of the time. Sometimes yes has to be denied or delayed. It’s not about saying yes to yourself on a level of selfishness. No, this is to invite and encourage you to turn your internal attention to this area of your life. Join me on this journey, and together, let’s begin saying yes to who and what matters.
Keep an eye out for the opportunity to grab a hard copy of Shonda Rhimes book Year of yes.
Do you agree that what and whom you say yes to can cause you to flourish or fade? Share why or (why not) in the comments below. I appreciate your support very much.
To BEing your better best self